The Weekend Update: HAPPY

1. Meet Jeff out for a 3 drink maximum night. Started at Hooligans, OG’s for curly fries and the fabulous Axels for darts.
2. John, if you’re reading this, I hope you are having a great time in Seattle, but BLOODY tell us you’re moving!
3. Drank beer, oh yeah and went on the Miller tour with a couple crazy friends.
4. Saw that my roommate was in much need of some Man Scaping.
5. If anyone hasn’t tried chicken cooked on a beer can, they should make it there Half Year Resolution.
6. Had a fantastic brunch at the Country Club (Grandma did not have a martini, I repeat did not)
7. Sound on the tallest point of Waukesha County where I could see Holy Hill, absolutely incredible
8. Skipped around the woods and swung on some tree (without getting hurt)
9. Found a new favorite toy, an electric stapler, although it’s best held by a handsome lad.
10. Went back to the County Claire for a new favorite beverage, the Irish Diesel.

My Chair!

Before and After

Here's what I've been working on for the past couple weeks. The photo doesn't do it justice so if anyone wants to come over and sit in the beauty they are more than welcome. Must bring wine.

Rooster Burger

I was curious as to why we don’t eat roosters. They look like a chicken, but how often to we grill up a rooster or have breaded rooster or Kentucky fried rooster? Never. So I did a little research on to see if the male version of a hen is edible:
“Rooster meat is by far tougher than hen's meat, but it is edible. It's the hormones in the meat that makes the difference. Just like with beef, for instance. A yearling steer (Castrated male, castrated while young) makes the best beef available. Cow meat isn't nearly as nice, and is often sold as 'budget' beef. It's still fairly edible, but has a little different flavour and is a little tougher, because of the estrogen that goes through their system. And bull meat is quite tough and stringy, and has a very stong flavour to it, because of the testosterone in it. “

Anyone up for a Rooster Burger?

The Weekend Update: Grandma Day

I ended the weekend completing one of my new year’s resolutions. Can you guess which one?

1. Caught up with William Zabka at the Ynot II.
2. Broke down after 6 months and had a piece of meat (summer sausage) and it was good.
3. Finished upholstering my chair!
4. Took my mom’s mom and her special friend out to dinner.
5. Didn’t win the conversation that grandma’s countertops have always had a pattern in them and there was no way windex got in them.
6. Was told by a two year old that I was scared of dogs.
7. If you ask a small child what her favorite dog does, there’s a good chance she’ll lick the side of your face.
8. Drank my first martini with my dad’s mom. The first sips were sketchy but after that it was a smooth ride and I understand why she walks down the beach with them.
9. After a weekend of not parting I brought a bottle of Cedarburg wine to Sara’s house and we didn’t stop till it was finished. There was food and Sunday evening programming on as well.
10. Realized the little things make all the difference.

Optomism in the Rain

Right now, in Milwaukee, it is pouring rain. I've decided to stay home from work and get some personal work down. Oddly I can't be more happy right now. Maybe it's because I haven't taken a personal day in about a year. Or it was the double chocolate-chocolate cake from last night that Big Mike at Baker's Square recommended. My Key lime pie failed when I was about to "woo" my handsome host Or it's the phone call for my next work opportunity. Or it was the 20lb lobster in the tank at William Ho's. Or maybe it is one of those times where everything in flows together. And the best part after the rain is that things will start to grow even more, even my chocolate appetite.

Where's the Beef?

So before hitting Euro bar for a birthday party my roomie and I stopped at the grocery store. I was beginning to think I was nuts and just forgetting to buy bread. Turns out my roomie has been scarfing down my whole wheat. And I owed him lime juice so off to the markets we went!
Processed cow in a can anyone?
Three loafs should do it!

The Weekend Update: Can't help but smile

My best senior picture pose.

The girls at the Eastsider

Another great weekend where everything was unplanned

1. If you go out with 3 other hot women you're bound to attract attention, get shots and get picked up by the Eastside bartender.
2. Laughed, danced and took our best pictures at Flannery's.
3. Got exceptionaly far on my chair I'm upholstering.
4. Learned never to use box die, although everyone loves gina in darker hair.
5. Saw my soon to be niece work a room of adults, she had us in tears, almost pissing ourselves with her comedy.
6. Learned the the jack-fruit is grown in tropical climates and can get up to 200 pounds. Yes I had the Jacked-Up salad at the forty8.
7. Played glow-in-the-dark frisbee in the Whitnall park gardens.
8. On the way back to Shorewood a long stem red rose ended up in my hand by an astonishing gentleman.
9. Walked by a house where the owner placed fake flowers in her yard. I chuckeled.
10. It's Sunday night and I still can't help but smile.

Place the food item in the food group

I started the vegetable/fruit inquiry by looking up cucumber in the dictionary. Turns out this long beloved vegetable is actually a fruit. So I brought this conversation up with someone and have been deliberating on what group the PEA fits into. Thoughts?

The Late Weekend Update

This weekend was so fun that I completely missed my monday post!

1. Met the girls for martinis at Hotel Metro
2. Dance and sang and watched Sara proceed from normal to bubbly at Lucilles (Happy B-day Jon!)
3. Showed my face in Jo Catz since the magical driver lisence night.
4. The only pick up line I got was from Sara, "If I said you had a great body would you hold it against me?" She grabbed me anyway.
5. My perfectionistic side got the best of me in my upholstery class
6. Cooked a fabolous dinner for a male. No, this one isn't my drug dealer
7. Partied out in Bayview, where I found Hayward Williams, he did the best cover of a Springsteen song to date!
8. Closed down LuLu's and had my first organic wine.
9. Had to have an intervention with me and Springsteen's new album.
10. Saw "Thank you for Smoking" and got a surprise when a flood of popcorn ended up on my lap.

turning Folk

Bruce Springsteen new album, We Shall Overcome, the Seeger Sessions, was released on Tuesday. I haven't stopped listening to it. While it is clear break from his classic rock it still is Bruce. Simple ballads songs are decorated with violins, trumpets, a tuba, a trombone, a banjo and even an accordion. There's a rooted serenity in how these songs are played. Removed from the sudio and recording in a country house comes out in the innocence of the song. If I could roll up my jeans and stomp in the mud I would, oh wait, I can!

The MAN candle

There's a man candle in the dining room. It suprisingly doesn't smell like girl or bakery. It smells like thick musty blueberries. So kudos to the candle factory for appealing to the male species.

Gina makes an arse out of herself

So yesterday I had a nice social activity with a handsome lad. We went to the driving range and then decided to stop at a burger joint. When the woman rings up the total I say, "I got it because you brought the balls." Pause. Pause. Pause. Yeah some people tell me I have a way with words.

The Weekend Update: Everyone’s getting old

1. Threw Dad a surprise birthday party although my Dad is a smart man and has his way of finding out about things.
2. The guy who made me wet myself when I was a kid brought tears to my eyes.
3. I haven’t accomplished one of my new years resolutions: Acquire a taste for martinis. This would have been the perfect time as Grandma was sipping them delightfully.
4. I really like upholstering
5. Discovered Bayview and had a fabulous birthday dinner for one of my many lovely friends.
6. I think my friend should start a car dancing sport.
7. Thrift shopping is best when you locate a shop in the wealthiest neighborhoods.
8. My hope to have a rockstar evening on Saturday turned into a Jazz affair on Sunday.
9. Working very hard the week before makes the weekend so much easier.
10. The week is best started with a walk to work with Jeff.

Beer for Breakfast

As usual, on my walks to work I usually notice something out of the ordinary. This morning I was crossing a street near the MSOE campus when this guy (a rugged 50 but slim) was riding his yellow bicycle. When I bring a lunch to work I usually throw it in a plastic bag and wrap it around my bike handles. This is because my bag is full of work shoes, a coffee thermos, a calendar and other misc items. It is quite hard to do this and I give credit to this man for riding with this plastic bag that could at any time jab into the front tire causing a scenario. Today, though, I could see the contents inside this plastic bag - three shinny cans of ICEHOUSE. It was 8:26 dude in the am. Here is what I'm thinking.

A. His wife left him and was grabbing the beer before she hit the road and a meesly 3 was all he could manage to save.
B. He found a way to drink during the workday at which I will have to find him to take lessons.
C. He was too drunk this morning to distinguish the coke cans from the beer cans.
D. He is on a new diet. Breakfast: beer, Lunch: beer, Snack: beer.
E. He works third shift and is headed for his after work drink since bars are not open.
F. He is just having a really bad morning.

The Weekend Update: Bear Right

If you would like to make a slight turn in Northern Wisconsin and Minnesota you would "bear right" instead of taking a slight right. This an other new learnings below.

1. Driving up to Mall of America takes way to long
2. Bridesmaid dresses can be found in a color and style that the whole bridal party is happy with - at the first store.
3. Customer service is horrible. Register Lady: The strapeless one comes with strapes or Would you like to try a size eight in a blue? ME: I'm not a size eight and we are not wearing blue.
4. Danielle will get served a water alongside a cocktail just because the waitress mistakes comedy for drunkeness
5. June Bugs does a body good.
6. Some men like to be rated in order of boyfriend potential.
7. UPF = Upper Pussy Fat (This woman looked like she was carry a cow's uterus below her belly button)
8. Speeding because I can't stand sitting will cause the State Trooper (female) to pull me over.
9. Teaching a 2 1/2 year old to blow bubbles is adorable.
10. Pepto must follow easter candy eatting.

The morning girl in kitchen scenario

This morning I went down to the kitchen to fill my thermos up with coffee and there was a girl there. Hmmm. And then she sat down in the living room and didn't say anything. One of my roomie's has a girlfriend so I called out, "Hey are you so and so's girlfriend?" Which she responded, " I'm his ex-girlfriend." I know he wouldn't cheat on his current girl due to our first gossip conversation about how mad he was at his mate for breaking one of the commandments. So if this girl was current girlfriend turned ex why was she still in the vacinity when he wasn't present?

The Weekend Update: The Warm front is moving up

So while most of my girlfriends left me for Vegas and Minnesota and my guy friends left me for an ex-boyfriends wedding I spent the weekend twidling my thumbs, yeah not really.

1. Thought I was going to a formal dinner party until the wedding veil, feather boa and whip came out.
2. Made it to Turner Hall for dinner and didn't get sick. Last time I had the fish fry I puked on the sidewalk an hour later.
3. Went to this great German beer House where the girls wore tight bossom dresses and some men wore leprachan shorts.
4. Threw a temper-tantrum in my upholstery class
5. Set up my new pad so it feels more like home.
6. Headed to North Ave only to retire from ever playing darts again, well unless I get a handicap of 51 points.
7. Capital Brewery has a new beer which is absolutely fantastic.
8. Added onto my New Years Resolution: Learn how to make pancakes
9. Watch my high school crush, Vince Carter, play and beat the Bucks.
10. Embraced this new weather called the sixties!

Do Wa Diddy Diddy Dum Diddy DO

Does anyone know what happened to Puffy Daddy aka Sean Combs aka Diddy aka P Diddy's band? I got sucked into a MTV marathon of making the band one Saturday I might have been hungover since I couldn't run away from the TV. A whole bunch of bubble gum girls tried out and Diddy hand picked 5 girls to make the band. I tried googling them and nothing. If anyone has any information regarding there wherabouts there will be reward of cookies in the form of bunnies. (Easter is coming)

Woman on Top

So I found out that I’m the only woman in the entire house. Besides my two male roommates there are two more that live on the first level. Needless to say I am the woman on top. So far I love it. I have heaps of space, my own 1/2 bath and an excellent view of the city. One of my roommates designs clothes as in wardrobes. He likes to save the earth as well but I’m far from making superhero capes. I think we will get along splendid. The other goes to school and works a lot. I’ve seen him once. They keep the dishes clean and the fridge free of mold. I will just have to work on organizing the kitchen a bit better.

The Weekend Update: New Carpet, Wall Carpet and Hair Carpet

When I think the dancing can't get worse it does. Charlotte was just dirty, Chicago was hootchie and West Bend, well it's interesting.

Here's the weekend update:

1. Saw the new version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Johnny Depp creeps me out.
2. Spent 3 hours pulling staples out of what will be my new green suede chair.
3. Sara and Jeff came from Milwaukee ( I don't know why) to West Bend.
4. Had a little dinner party which meat was not present. Tony did you stop at McDonalds on the way home?
5. Sara's goal of seeing a mullet was met 32 minutes upon arrival on bar premise.
6. Going to start actively campaigning sufflepuck as an Olympic sport.
7. Jeff would like to state for the record he is a redneck woman.
8. Watched some broad "pole dance" with a carpeted square pole. Nothing says sexy like carpet.
9. My 5 year drought of the WB George Web was brought to an end.
10. Right now I'm packing thinking of the wonderful life I will have with clean dishes and Pitches Bar.

FYI: Hair coming out of the top of a shirt is not sexy

Breathing

Thank you to those you prayed to the apartment gods - Gina has a found a place. A rather spacious place. And ever close place to Brady. Sara I know you really wanted to go to Pitches bar for you birthday, but can we go sooner? It's a half block away! So what was the first thing I noticed? A clean sink. Did you know that dishes belong in a cupboard and not in the sink! Amazing the difference! I will keep you up to date.

Getting my Revenge

I've decided to take revenge on the she-devils that currently reside in this supposedly free apartment. I've decided to actively use dishes and not wash them. Just now I ate some Indian food and drank some milk. Now just imagine in two weeks what that will smell like, some light sour vomit? Oh they are in for a treat. That container of chocolate cookie dough I was eating to soothe my pain the night before - yup that's still sitting there. That's right talk to the mold 'cause the plate ain't gettin' cleaned!

I wish I could light my roommates on fire

So over the past 11 months I've discovered my roommates are deadbeats only through letters and phone calls from the landlord requesting rent. Upon this 11th month I've decided to move the f**k out! Either I'm going back to West Bend or if you know anybody a level above deadbeat that has an extra bedroom let me know. I'm eatting a batch of chocolate cookie dough gone wrong to soothe the pain.

Poll: the eighties

Riding the bus today I saw a very troubling sight: a woman with some extravagent headgear.

If the eighties are coming back should I invest in some scrunchies?

yes or no?

The weekend update: Estrogen

A hormone produced by the ovaries and testes. It stimulates the development of secondary sexual characteristics and induces menstruation in women. Estrogen is important for the maintenance of normal brain function and development of nerve cells.

If Estrogen maintains normal brain function I didn't have enough martinis or environmental testosterone.
This weekend was rather good for me as I didn't overindulged in cocktails or men.

1. Buckhead had a party which we could see our table underneath glasses of pink vodka. I actually became irratated at men on the dance floor and maintain sobriety in order to kung fu fight their ass if they touched my hair one more time.
2. Got some digits.....from a girl : )
3. Met some fabulous ladies at Hotel Metro for martini night (Grandma this is the place we should go!)
4. Caught up with 3 lovely females over changing colored lights and chocolate martinis at the Vucherria.
5. Found out men cry too, right matt?
6. Shopped at a Japanese grocery store to find my new favorite indulgence. A green tea - twinkie cake.
7. The best way to eat sushi is with chopsticks, a glass of wine and two great girl friends.
8. Save a mechanical bull ride a cowboy! Watched my friend ride her heart out on a bull, not Scottie Pippen which would be her first choice. If you lost your copy of Coyote Ugly, you could go to Hogs and Hunneys in Lincoln Park to get your fix, thanks Scott for getting us in. I would had paid the cover at any other bar if I didn't have to wipe the drool from the men checking out girls in miniskirts who is most likely taking some kind of STD medication.
9. Finally won in chess! I think it was the giant size chess pieces at Andoyne that helped me out.
10. Finished watching the movie Ray for the first time and loved it. Absolutely amazing - if you haven't seen it rent it!

I miss football.

Reflection

My close friends and family know that I would rather not have March 18 on the calendar. On that day I forgot about the ordinary and go exploring. Last year I was in Sydney roaming around the city making believing I could build a raft to sail the ocean, this year I was letting the sense of taste and smell wrap around fermented grapes. Know if March 18 didn't happen four years ago I have no idea where I would be. I doubt I would have been in Australia when I was or tasting wines with a good friend. Life has much to do with the people you connect with. Each connection leads us to different places emotionally and physically. So thank you to all the people that have moved me. I hope I have at least moved one person closer happiness.

The extended weekend update: After Charlotte

After a 4 day weekend there has to be a list.

1.Thursday night headed to Buckhead with my girl friend from Appleton who will remain nameless but if you know her, you've probably received several phone calls from her around 2am. Oh yeah we started with $2 martinis.
2. After expending little cash over much gin we wanted to dance and of course the place to do that is JoCats.
3. I didn't know how many dances could be done on the floor of Jo Cats till I saw it in action.
4. It might be a good idea to leave credit cards at home, because once you start trying to pay with your driver's license or are found swiping the ATM machine with one you know it is time to go home. (cough cough)
5. Actually woke up with enough time to get on a plane to Charlotte, a St. Patty's day beer was out of the question
6. Arrived with the most beautiful weather. On the drive to our lovely hostess' house little white flowers blew like snow over the car.
7. Had dinner and drinks at a primo hangout of Nascar drivers. I learned that Charlotte was heavily populated by these race car drivers.
8. Some of the other people that hang out at this spot include bald men that suction cans of red bull to their head, boys with bozo like hair that wear jeans hanging off their rear and person in unknown superhero costume.
9. Saturday was brilliant. We drove through the country to 4 wineries tasting about 40+ wines
10. Childress winery was opened by some famous person associated with racing. My favorite was the wine whose description included "great for drinking on the porch" my least favorite was the wine served with "wild game"
11. Raylen winery had my favorite wine, a Yadkin Gold and my new favorite dessert. Chocolate covered Category 5 (a type of red wine).
12. Westbend winery had a sweet elderly gentlemen serving us more than the usual. I told the employees I grew up in West Bend, WI and they were astonished. They said they have received many phone calls concerning kitchen appliances.
13. RagApple winery was my least favorite or maybe I had already tried too many wines by this point.
14. Saturday night off to dinner at an adult arcade. Put me in front of the skee ball and I was set.
15. Went to a very classy establishment named BAR Charlotte. I forgot to pack my mini skirt and g-string so I didn't fit in.
16. Witnessed various activities which I felt I should have paid for via a porn video or strip club, these included pole dancing, pole dancing with sailors, bar dancing with short skirts, riding the giant swing above the bar, bull riding where butt checks were shaking and too many pink g-strings.
17. For amusement purposes of my group I decided to dance with a Mr. Preppie Blue Shirt. He had this dance move which I named a cross between riding a horse and working on the elliptical at a 45 degree angle. I thought of my Grandma's advice and decided not to go home with the talented boy.
18. After a long restful sleep the girls got our shopping on.
19. Had a relaxing dinner party with there were true southern accents, adorable babies and good food.
20. I can't believe it's Monday and that I've finished my box of chocolate covered wine!

I can't date my drug dealers anymore

My grandma on my mom's side who I love so dearly for her sensibility wrote me a letter with some words of advice to my sister and I.

"I pray that you girls can meet up with someone of interest that can turn your life around and make yous happy. You are going to have to get into things of interest to meet up with guys, but not bars & drinking & drugs. There must be places you can join and I always say church, but you don't believe.

From the letter you can see my sister (Danielle) are very unhappy and all we do is drown ourselves in toxins. So for all you that want us to quit with the needles and join the nunnery it will be a long run but if there is a God at the end of the tunnel it might be worth it. He will be my new man.

p.s. Sorry to hear you losing your purse. I lost a nice new swimming cap"

Boy Scout Services for Sale

Upon consuming half a box of girl scout cookies in less than a day I've decided that boy scouts should offer something to the vast population of the United States. They could go door to door with premaid checklists of activities for the same price as a box of girl scout cookies. So America ( minus boy perverts) we have a young lad ready to do some chores. Here's a list, feel free to add on.

1. Taking out the garbage, sanatizing the cans with scent of choice (boys will be equipped)
2. Cleaning the garage, waxing the car, changing your car's oil
3. Washing the windows, there should be birds trying to fly in soon after (boys will be able to care for bird after contact)
4. Scrubbing the floor, wood floors should smell like the redwood forest, ceramic should be spotless without the elderly falling
5. Organize your dvd, cd, vhs collection. Please remove your porn before scout comes
6. Full clean out of the fridge, do the grocery shopping and make a nice dinner
7. Feeding of your dog Toto, take it for a walk, wash and dry
8. Teaching you how to work all the appliances you don't know how to use, like the cappacino machine that is sitting in a cabinent.
9. Shinning all your shoes and optimizing them for most comfort
10. Doing of taxes with the most refund back

Day Four: No Money or ID

I was going to call this Day Four: Marriage proposal but the no money and no id kinda takes the cake. So come time to leave the bar (after taking shots of dirty girl scouts) I saw goodbye to my new friends and stumble into a cab. Next thing I know it's 8am and I haven't changed clothes. So I do my usual check of things. Laptop check, room key check, purse - hmmmmm...Where is my purse?

How does this work? I have no cash besides the $9 I found in my back pocket, no standard ID and no cellphone. Did I drop it, Did I leave it in the cab, Did someone steal it? Ugh - so many questions. I'm very good about not freaking out so I didn't - It's just things and I guess if worse comes to worse I could get some Mircrosoft guy to marry me and give me an allowance every week.

So I spent the day at the conference - which this day was quiet excellent in terms of speakers. The flash film festival took place at night and was an enjoyment. In the meantime I spent too much time getting faxed copies of my ID and collecting cash from Western Union. It was on my way to Western Union that I got the line "Hey gorgeous will you marry me?"
The sun was setting, it was romantic except that I've never met the guy and he had a voice box from smoking to much. My first marriage proposal I had to turn down. I hope it doesn't bring bad karma.

Yes so after chatting to Lynda of Lynda.com I headed back to the hostel to grab my suitcase and take a stab at getting through airport security. As soon as I walk in the people behind the desk look like they have seen a ghost. Guess what they have. Yes my purse. Second floor women's bathroom had my purse. At least I was a semi-smart drinker and didn't leave it in the cab. Me and my purse frolliced to the airport.

Day Three: Dirty Dirty Girl Scouts

I did spend most of the day hiding from creepy guy #1. On my schedule shopping was in session for the afternoon workshops. I took my new fun friend from Berkely over to Anthropologie. She had never been! I don't know what was more exciting for her, the store or the conference. The rest of the day was workshops, workshops and more workshops. I don't know if the evening was the upswing or downswing. Free booze + Gina hasn't had a drink in awhile = danger. The creepy guy ended up finding me and I just had to shake him off. So me and a couple other locals dragged our bags to Capital Hill. I'd say I was quiet impressive with my beer drinking skills. Then we made our way up street to a place called the garage to play some shuffle board. They have a nasty drink called the greyhound - organce juice and gin. Nasty very nasty. So I thought I was classy with my vodka drinks until I decided shots would be good. More to come......

Day Two: It Rains A LOT!

Day Two: Monday - the first Day of the Conference

I woke up extremely early, 5:30 am (7:30 Midwest time) and checked in over 600 people. checked out a handful.... After my shift I decided that I was too worked up being in the building so I ventured outside. I found my way to the space needle by looking up at the sky and walking toward the large object. It was everything I expected to be and nothing more. Then I decided to go shopping. They have a giant market with lots of little shops and big fish. Instead of buying clothes I found some Moroccan bowls. Not sure yet on how they will get home. Then I decided I should go back to the conference and learn something. Not only did I learn but I was inspired. A nice fellow chatted me up and we planned dinner and drinks. It was good till the end. I had to shove him in a cab right before he tried getting a bit of lip action, literally.

Day One

So Day One started with driving home from Appleton then hopping on a plane to Seattle:
Things Learned

1. Sugar free candy is bad for you. Just ask Katie and the toliet.
2. It's ok not to bring the high heels
3. I learned where Detroit is
4. Guys with children sitting across the aisle aren't always married. He will give away his daugther snow white card with digits on hoping i'll call.
5. the 5 year old daugther is smart. when her dad got up and was out of earshot she turns to me and says "Daddy likes to stink up the bathroom"
6. I'm african american lesbian likable in not the way I want to be liked.
7. Being a geek will bring you closer to people like lydia of lydia.com
8. Australians are just as nice in America. And I asked the aussie what the most interesting part of north america was. It's a tie between trailer parks and dollar bills.
9. I'm tired after getting two hours of sleep but was still able to get my work-out in. Surprisingly the West Bend YMCA is 12 times better.
10. Computer guys are damn attractive and well paid.

Cutting loose

Ah Wednesday is always an interesting time especially if you venture around North Ave. Jeff and I are very good at this. Upon entering the BBC I find one of my many wannabe boyfriends. They wannabe be my boyfriend but I don't want them to be. So I enter with my friend Jon and of course this person is going to think that me and Jon are dating so now I actually have to go over there and make my peace. Then I find out that one of his friends knows my sister and that's all I'm going to say about that.

My friends were in prime form. When some fools announces over the loudspeaker that they are the best foosball players, there is immediate running to the foostable for a competition. My friend's reined supreme.

I met a new friend. The crazy guy that lives on the upstairs on the BBC. Words cannot explain what I saw. This man's living space is the most packed antique shop one has ever seen. Bells and plants are friends. Coats hanging from the ceiling like a dry cleaner shop. He has a magical way of talking. We would be finding out about his mink coat and then we were talking about two Chinese girls spinning. Just out of this world.

I also just love catching up with friends I haven't seen in ages. Upon entering Live I ran into a guy I haven't seen in two years and he was at his going away party. I also now have a temporary plan with an old college friend to buy land in Colorado. He's going to attach a horse stable for me on his airplane hanger (which he is going to build). I thought that was rather nice but then I though the glass of beer was nice as well. Ah it was a classic night.

Jeff, I hear you are a good dancer.

Fun photos!

Here was one of the birthdays - guess I had more fun than I thought

The Weekend Update: It's freezing!

So it was in the negative digits but we still went out (with warmer coats) Here is what I learned.

1. Come to the Cheesecake factory a solid hour before you want to eat.
2. It's ok to order a cheesecake for dinner
3. Eric Bana is a HOT AUSSIE! and the movie Munich was good as well.
4. There is always the windows to crawl out of when the doors to your mini lock you in.
5. I like furniture upholstery
6. Synchronized sit ups are in
7. My friends are morons for tailgating at -11 degrees for a basketball game
8. I can still look good without wearing open toed shoes
9. My St. Louis friend never ceases to amaze me.
10. It is unethical to watch John Corbett a block away from my apartment because it's country and even though he is a hot hot hot actor that doesn't mean he is my springsteen!

Spam Carving Contest

My grandma will love this

While researching Seattle and deciding how to fill my time I came across a calendar of events. Seems that the Tuesday before Lent (Fat Tuesday) Seattle has a spam carving contest. I'm sorry to let my family of spam eatters down but I will not be attending. I think the smell of it will collaspe my 3-months of being a vegetarian.

I haven't heard that one before

short bald guy in late 20's: "Is that a burrito or your purse?"

me: (eye roll to sara thinking this guy is pathetic)

short bald guy getting annoying: " So are you two friends?"

sara: "No we hate each other"

surprised bald guy: (coy) " You date each other? Wow"
- - - - - -- - - - - - - - - -- - -

Not to worry Tony, your pick up line still isn't beaten. " You're pretty and I'm drunk, take me home"

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY EVERYONE

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

The Weekend Update: Birthdays Birthdays Birthdays!

After a weekend of birthday of course there is going to be a list!




1. Got lost in the gettho, kenosha county and the seventies trying to find a house in Racine.
2. Surprised my friend for her 30th birthday!
3. Was a standout student in my saturday upholstery class.
4. Celebrated my friend's 27th birthday on Brady Street.
5. Found out the more alcohol a person drinks ( I won't name any names but if Becca slips out it's not my fault) the more one professes her love, gives hugs and professes her love.
6. Became smart and didn't drown myself in gin, this helped in turning down stupid guys.


7. Had a blast with a new friend. He did everything a boyfriend would do - keep guys away, dance well and present me cheetos after the bar. Too bad he has a girlfriend. >>me on the far left, boy, and sarah doing her thing.
8. Had "dinner" at noon with my grandma and her special friend for her 80th birthday.
9. Decided that the best way to meet a guy is to become a priest, imagine I have the whole congregation to preach to my hopes wishes for their single-well to do-groomed sons, brothers, fathers....
10. If you recognize someone and can't seem to remember how you know the person, always reference Fitzgibbions.

Landhopper

Since I was feeling better I decided to book myself a ticket to Seattle. It was exactly one year ago that I hopped on a plane to Australia without any idea what I was doing. Still now, I don't know anyone and have no itinerary (as of yet). I'll be volunteering at a geek conference where there are about 80% males in attendance. I think I will have a lot of fun and meet some cool designers and programmers. Plus it's Seattle so maybe there is a single guy (with a dog) with enough money to buy my a cabin in the mountains, oh yeah we'd fall in love first. So...if anyone has any pointers or know of any destinations that I must go to, please let me know. You have 2 weeks!

bulimic junkie

I've been trying to give up suguar, especially sugar in my coffee. So for two days I went without sugar. I felt like a junkie coming down. To top it off my stomach decided to hate me and turned bullimic. i guess I will have to forgoe the chocolate cake for breakfast and munch on some ice cubes.

Dirty Photos - Dare to look!

I bought myself a digital camera on ebay this weekend and the very attractive seller dropped it off at my office this morning. I think I might have to buy some new dishes as I'm afraid what lifeforms have invaded these. Isn't this disgusting! Help!

13 hours and high on spray mount

I will be in recovery for my 13 hour day at work. You can either find me at Mo's, in my bed, or the police office for punching a person that should have stayed and helped. I haven't checked the kitchen sink to see if the dishes are done. I don't have enough energy to throw them out the window but that might be a nice activity after tommorrow's beer.

The Weekend Update: Live after Florida

I headed to Florida and as always going with the family is always an adventure.

1. Seeing Dad's exgirlfriend at the airport caused a stir not only for his finace but the ex as well
2. Danielle didn't puke on the plane!!!!
3. Rode in style, as in the OJ get away van
4. Got asked to dance via piece of paper, would you like to dance check yes or no. and that was the only guy my age I met
5. Signed Dad up for Karoke without telling him
6. The bar made me sign up, as pentance for #5, I picked a song I think I could sign but realized I just like to dance to it late at night. So Terry sang I danced and sometimes sang the chorus.
7. Listen to a my family trying to sing all the way home a song they didn't know.
8. Formed a small cult Saturday morning, the 13 bright yellow school bus shirt kind
9. For the first time ever, Grandma asked Grandpa if he was ready to go home!
10. 8 kids and 2 granddaughters drank and listened to Grandpa tell wild stories with the occasional chimming in of Grandm
11. I proved best at cards and took everyone's money
12. Danielle was able to get into a bar and drink and I couldn't ! forgot my id in my shorts
13. Broke down and ate fish, in the wisdom of homer: Grouper sandwich, ooooooo!
14. Today is my last birthday celebration: the chinese new year - year of the dog. I did my cleaning yesterday and after filling barrels with leaves I told grandma, "I filled three" which she interpretted for "I feel free" I suppose either is right
15. Came back to Milwaukee and not surprised found the dishes exactly the same place as they were Friday morning.

Pointers from the week and weekend

How to get a free drink
1. Sit close the the bar
2. Not pay attention to the bartenders playing throw the alchohol
3. Wait till they get crazy and move off court
4. Watch the half drinking beer can spill on your leg
5. Cute bartender apologizes profusely
6. Bartender offers drink(s) or shots in my case

For men to have a one night stand ( Saturday night a guy approached me and went from step 1 to just straight out asking so I gave him some advice)
1. Tell a girl she is attractive
2. Tell her you want to hang out with her in the upcoming week
3. Ask her to dance (if you're at Jo Cats)
4. Tell her how gorgeous she is
5. Ask her for her phone number
6. Tell her you can't believe she doesn't have a boyfriend
7. Convince her that you need in at her place pronto because you can't wait for the week.

How to order a Jimmy Johns Sub (This could backfire if you want mayo or a neighbor comes over and eats the sub)
1. Call Tony and ask him for the Jimmy John's number
or
2. Walk to Jimmy Johns
3. Find a guy who looks like bruce springsteen and happens to be vegetarian
4. Ask him what he ordered
5. Ask him to order for you

Affair with the Monitor

How is it that I can have great relationships over email verses face to face? This has happened with several people (guys more or less) and we have a witty repartee, fun conversations and great shares. When we get face to face I just want to drink myself drunk so I don't have to deal with the person. I would rather continue these relationships behind a computer rather than have any physical presence. Is that wrong?

the Weekend Update

losing my voice can make for an interesting weekend


1. I should have worn a name tag that said, "Hi my name is gina, I lost my voice, I'll have a vodka cranberry please." because I got straight cranberry flavor vodka or voda and coke.
2. People thought I was rude for not making coversation with them
3. Had to have Jeff order my drinks for me
4. Trying to cover my ass running into several guys in the same place can be trickey without a voice
5. The bucks lost because I couldn't scream orders at them
6. Drinking too much to soothe a throat causes mixed signals
7. I can befriend a gay man without my charimsa but by my cute clutch purse and fancy scarf
8. Unable to order a sub at Jimmy Johns because they wouldn't be able to see my hand gestures over the phone
9. Not being able to breathe makes picking up a smoke very hard, which is a good thing
10. Having breakfast with the girls makes the weekend much more peaceful

scrubbing mold

yay! my roomies have scrubbed the mold off their dishes, hurrah - pop the bubbly!
now, about that garbage sitting next to the door........

my voice held captive by the stars

just read my horoscope to find the the stars knew that i would be losing my voice, any conversations i did have were difficult and people smiled and chuckled or thought i was rude for not responding.

Although it's not easy to surprise you, today will prove the exception to that rule. There's at least one major surprise en route in the department of communications. Routine conversations and encounters won't be quite so routine right about now. That goes for any conversation, whether it's in person or via phone, email or snail mail. If you expect it to turn out one way, it could quite possibly end up in an entirely different direction. Ready or not, here it comes!

Losing stuff at the bar, like my voice

I lost my voice! I have no idea when I'm going to get it back but it makes it very trickey to order a drink, talk to a guy or even conduct work! Maybe I can get one of those machines that one puts up to the throat. That would be scary, imagine me calling jeff up wanting to go out (in a bad computer output) H E Y J E F F W H A T A R E U D O I N G T O N I G H T ? Well I hope my voice comes back I have a "thing" tonight.

Halloween in the kitchen

My roommates have not learned to throw things out. Garbage being one, Mold being two and the pumpkins from Halloween are still sitting in the kitchen. One of them was saying she was going to take our Christmas tree down and I just looked at the large orange objects and cried. I don't know how to get them to throw away month old food or take the garbage out. They did really well for one or two weeks but now the containers that they threw out the moldy food is still sitting on the sink. I will not touch it. I lied, I threw some out because no matter how hard one scrubs that shit is disgusting. They have not learned how to do dishes or take out the garbage. I try retaliating by not doing my dishes for a week but then when I want to cook or need a spoon to stir my coffee I end up doing all the dishes. Do you think they will notice if I start selling their stuff on eBay?

24 in 06

Happy new year and happy birthday to me!

A few things already learned
1. Don't fall off your barstool or you will be sent home
2. Replacing beer with vodka is not always a good decision
3. Buying a bed will enhance sleeping
4. Sneaking out to go dancing is always fun
5. Wearing no makeup to the Y will make you 18 again*
6. Recovery after a night a partying is painful
7. Having good friends is a blessing
8. There are fabulous people in the world who will polietly inform you that the guy you are talking to has a v.d.
9. Knowing when to cab it home is a good asset
10. Flowers brighten up not only a room but the heart.

* In order to use the adult locker room at the YMCA one has to be 18. I got aksed this morning if I was 18. I was shook up! How, after my 24th birthday do I look 17? And how was it that when I was 17 and 18 I could walk into a bar and not get carded? When one is under 21 we strive to look older, but when does it happen that we want to look younger - is it starting now? How will I ever find a guy if I look 17?

Dog of the Week

now this is love

2005 Wrap-up

In twelve more hours we will enter 2006.
Funny to think that Australia already celebrated the new year 4 hours ago.

So do I feel like I had an accomplishing year? Seeing has how I never made a resolution last year yes.

Upon my many adventures traveling, hanging out with friends and trying to date again I can enter 2006 a smarter woman. I fell in love, danced my butt off, pretended I was Swedish, lived out a suitcase for 3 months, drank way to much, got a promotion at work, watch my sister grow up, got more work, said goodbye too early to a friend and roommate, lived in the most beautiful place in the world, saw the galaxy, watched my family expand, got my heart broken, established better friendships, learned to be more open and honest, gave up meat, bought my first new car, learned to laugh more, started saving the planet, heightened my obsession with The Boss, learned when a relationship is a disaster that there is nothing that can fix it, learned to forgive and cherish the good moments rather than the bad, threw out a lot of mold and toothbrushes, made some new girl friends, was awakened by Buddhism, kissed a lot of unpotential guys, did a lot of running.

Next year I will acquire a taste for martinis, drink less, drink more tea, not think too hard about guys and relationships, be a better friend, a sister, a daughter and step sibling, figure out where I want to live, indulge in the mountains, detach myself from the computer, make art, make new friends, decrease negativity, be more productive, try to work on my six-pack abs, help someone in need, educate.

live and love life.

cheers,

gina

the blog needs a resolution

hello all, its coming up on new years and we are all making or not making our resolutions. I figured the blog needed a resolution as well. My grandma would like to see less drinking. More posts about late night bar hopping might make me a seat in AA. For example a few suggestions could include my sister's new job. Considering she didn't know how to open a bottle of wine or still has an adult helper cut her meat this could prove a challenging adventure. OR I could elaborate on stalking plans with the chicago bulls. I'll have to ask my chicago friend which one we are stalking first. OR gina's dating experience is always a good laugh. POST POST POST!

the radio is clean

Yes the radio is clean again! I can turn on my stations and listen to my oldies without frosty! How exciting, however I did get a the 30th anniversary bruce springsteen collection so I will have to wear out that cd first. Speaking of Bruce does anyone want to come over and watch my bruce springsteen dvds. (wink)

Cute

I have a present for you!"

from my soon to be step-niece and step-sister in the background (she ain't the mommy - fyi).

Merry Christmas Eve

Hope everyone has a happy holiday and if you could refrain from shopping today that would be excellent as now I need to brave a shopping mall.

Time in a Pickle Jar - Part 2

You will be happy to know that I successfully matched up Boy Friday and Boy Saturday's phone numbers. Crisis Adverted? Never.... Both boys called and messaged me Saturday. Fine - I'm hanging out with my sister anyway so I cannot hang out with either. That is till I come home. Boy Friday and Boy Saturday seem to have a mutual friend that happens to live across the hall. I call up my lovely friends Jeff and Chris to come over and we have a great time but I think after an hour or so of Boy Friday and Saturday wanting "this girl" across the hall to come over I think they final realize that they are talking about the same girl. Why can't I just have fun! Stay tuned for my next move!

Rich People don't care about Christmas, or they could be Jewish

Yesterday I took a little drive along Lake Drive with intentions of seeing spectacular light displays. I was very disappointed. Here these people have emptied out there piggy banks to finance some of the best houses in Milwaukee and they can't even look through there couch cushions to pay there servants to hang up some bloody lights! Maybe it's the cost of heating there mansion that they can't afford to plug in 100ft of lights or a waving Santa. Maybe there servants boycotted Christmas or maybe everyone on Lake drive is just Jewish.

FYI: I'm still alive

Just a little note that I am not the gina johnson that passed away Dec. 12 as posted by the Milwaukee Journal Setinel. If you would still like to send flowers and money you can send them to my milwaukee address. I perfer orchids but since they are out of season, and holiday plants would be fine.

Double time in a Pickle Jar

What happens when you give your phone number out to two guys that both happen to have the same name?

The Weekend Update

If you're going to party this weekend you better do it right

Friday
1. Miller Time - good for an after work celebatory beer
2. the Neighboors Apartment - good for playing trivial pursuit
3. the Stranger's Apartment - good for shots and an unlimited amount of beer
4. Eastsider - good for meeting my friends and strong vodka cranberries
5. Club Havana - good for getting hooked up with the co-worker discount shot, creepy men, and spicey music
6. Flannery's - good for kodak moments
7. the Neighbor's Apartment (post party) - good for pouring white russians all over their kitchen table
8. my Apartment (post party)- good for putting my pick-up line into action, "Wanna come over and watch my Bruce Springsteen dvds"

Saturday
1. the Mirmar theater - good for puppet shows - you know ones with a penis - yes just a penis - actually there were no puppets - just a couple men doing tricks - yes with their penis.
2. the Vucerria - good for $5 martinis and learning that my girl friend thinks cheese ages well, 6 is the new 26, and finalizing plans for stalking some of the Chicago Bulls.
3. the Garage - a good place to watch your friends transform into sober to not sober
4. Jo Cats - a great place to shake your butt and get down and I mean get down.
5. the Walk Home - a good place to holla at boys to come over
6. my Apartment - a good place to keep on drinking
7. the Hallway - a good place to bring the neighbor's party over
8. my Apartment - (see #6) and blast the music before getting yelled at, sing and dance with bankers and watch my friend seduce yet another one

Sunday
1. my Apartment - wake up to someone cleaning my apartment and learning that I was up almost till sunrise
2. Gills - an quiet place to have breakfast with four of my dearest friends

Office Politics

Today I got scorned because I threw away an old box top that was our organizational means of holding legal size paper. I WAS trying to make a better work flow - however clutter and dust fashions well in my office. Now, what color holiday ornaments go well with the nazi symbol above my desk?

One Month

"I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals,
it's because I hate vegetables!"
- Woody Allen

Corona and Sun: Adventures in Mexico

Greetings, I am back from Mexico and I know you are anxious to here about the shit in the sink and other fun stories.

Preface: Wednesday night was the second biggest drinking night of the year, behind New Year's Eve. So my sister now 21 and I back in West Bend went and hit up the bars downtown, her with her friends and me with mine. There were lines to get into the hick-est of bars and snow (snow! - I haven't seen snow before Thanksgiving in ages! ) So I had arranged to pick Danielle up from the bar on my way home. Hmmm no Danielle and the bar is empty - so I arrived home around 2:30 and set the alarm for 4.

Thursday
I woke up to my father and the light on saying I had five minuetes to get into the car. I ran around like a mad woman pushing the rest of my clothes into my bag and jumped into the freezing car. There I finally found Danielle happy as can be. I was glad I wasn't hungover but I still smelled like bar luckily Danielle was in the same boat - except for the hungover part (she was still drunk during the car ride to Chicago and doesn't remember it)

It must be a family trait because on my 21st birthday I went to Vegas and puked on the plane. Needless to say, Danielle not only matched that but twice over. Here she is happy in the sand. I tried getting her drunk but she just wouldn't drink fast enough!



We went to an All-Inclusive resort in Nuevo Vallarta - just north of Puerto Vallarta. That means not only free food, but drinks 24/7 at the various bars and swim up bars. Yes swim up bars.

Top ten drinks:
1. Sangria
2. Strawberry Daiquiri
3. Pina Colada
4. Long Island
5. The Tornado
7. Mai Tai
8. Corona
9. Sex on the Beach
10. Amaretto in coffee

The resort was fabulous and the weather was excellent. It was more American-ized than expected so I was itching to get out into real culture.


Friday
Danielle and I soaked up the sun and proceed from white to burned.

In the afternoon we took a taxi to Old Town in Puerto Vallarta. It was interesting seeing signs in Spanish as well as pickups carry 3 - 10 people. We walked around trying to find senor frogs but ended up going to a bar/club called HILO. A huge statue was portruding out from the building and it radiated red light. We sat on chairs upholstered with cow hydes next to the street where the little mexican would try to get me to buy one of his roses. We assumed the theme of the bar was a heaven/hell mix but upon translation of several waiters we figured it had to do with the history of thread. I'm still scratching my head at that one.

We headed back to the resort giddy and ready to eat at the Spanish/Italian restaurant. Upon receiving our first course it was decided that the waiter didn't know what we ordered and also seeing other people get served ahead of us I decided to head out to the drink bar and fill up on long islands. I have no idea what or why we all were laughing so hard but other table were looking and all we wanted was our food. Finally we got our food and became entralled with the flamming dessert at the other table. We had to have one.

After dinner we headed to the club sans Danielle. They played this 10 minuete long spanish dance song. It's similar to the marcarana where there are dance moves but it is not as repititious. My favorite is when the shirts come off. I told Terry it was her surprise bachellorette party. You will have to wait this pic till Dad figures out his digital camera. (no he did not take the pic - I did : ) So after much drinking and dancing we headed back. I swung by the outside bar and picked up a drink for 40 yard walk home.

So while sipping my drink and talking to Dad we hearded Terry run down the stairs screaming. She said there are turds in the sink! Turds in the sink. Then she filled us on some more information - they also have eyes! Yes turds with eyes are in her sink. Was this a Mexican prank? So we ran up to take a gander. Yup there they were turds with eyes and I wanted to see what would happen if I turned the water on. They moved! I was trying to figure out how these frog/mice/turd things crawled up into the sink. It just wasn't possible! Dad to the rescue removed the now deemed as "bats" outside. Bats Bats Bats were in the sink! Ewww - yes I have a pic of that one too.

Saturday
We headed to Las Calentas - a destination only one could get to by boat. It was fabricated so it looked like a resort but enough so it still had some culture. Bathrooms were in little huts and sinks were bowls. There were beautiful parrots and monkeys. Here Dad made a new friend. I just don't understand why he can bond with our dogs like that?



Here is me chillin in a hammock



Here is Dad and Terri who braved the cool waters to swim to the raft. I was told there were some beautiful fish and sting rays. Terri lost her sunglasses and Dad played Subca Steve - decked out in googles, a snorkel and fins. Really wish we could have captured that but some things are just so funny that you have to sit and laugh and try not to piss yourself.



Everyone in the group went on a nature hike and I wanted to do yoga. Yoga wasn't happening but Mr. John from Dallas was. A young lad approached me. I found out latter that my family was spying on me while high up in the mountain while I was chatting away. He and I took our own nature hike and ended up discovering hundreds of crabs. When we finally decided to turn around we say everyone was boarding the boat to go home. Ah! The mexicans were yelling at us in Spanish to get on the boat. Too bad he was too young for me to want to make an effort to his request to come party with him.

Dinner highlights: the waiter who meow-ed and convincing danielle that mexican steak was kangaroo.

We finally ALL went to the club. Dani and I have a blast dancing. Dad and Terry were even rolling out some moves. Then two guys approached Danielle and I and we danced and danced and danced. It was steamy. We decided to leave because you can be a good dancer and still be a dud. So she went to bed and I stayed up trying to watch this Mexican soap opera - until it turned into porn. Porn on basic cable - those mexicans must be happy!

Sunday

Last day! If you're a vegetarian on an airplane - you're going to go hungry. If you're a woman who has nice hair you're going to get your hairspray taken.

Who Shit in the Sink?

Writings and pictures from Mexico are on their way, but can you guess who shit in the sink?

Tofu and the great beyond

Day 21 without meat

I had my first experience with tofu tonight. Unlike men, I had low expecatations going in. But I think this relationship is going to work.

I think my roommate is using my toothbrush

I had to buy a new toothbrush because mine disappeared. One of my roommates leaves and sleeps at her boyfriend's place, taking her toothbrush with. One day last week I went to brush my teeth and saw two brushes that weren't mine. I went out a bought a new one, it's blue. My old one did return home but I sure wasn't going to use it. I was going to use it for cleaning the cracks in the shower, so I left it till I felt so inclinded to do so. If we do the math their should be a total of 4 toothbrushes. Two are mine and two, one for each of my roommates. So last night after the horrible Packer I went to clean my pretty teeth. How many toothbrushes? TWO! Two toothbrushes and both are mine, where did they go and why is my old one wet??? What's next, sharing underwear?

Just how retarded is retarded?

ALERT: EPA PROPOSES CHEMICAL AND PESTICIDE TESTING ON ORPHANS & MENTALLY HANDICAPPED CHILDREN
Public comments are now being accepted by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) on its newly proposed federal regulation regarding the testing of chemicals and pesticides on human subjects. Earlier this year, Congress had mandated the EPA create a rule that permanently bans chemical testing on pregnant women and children, but the EPA's newly proposed rule puts industry profits ahead of children's welfare. The rule allows for government and industry scientists to treat children as human guinea pigs in chemical experiments in the following situations:

1. Children who "cannot be reasonably consulted," such as those that are mentally handicapped or orphaned newborns may be tested on. With permission from the institution or guardian in charge of the individual, the child may be exposed to chemicals for the sake of research.
2. Parental consent forms are not necessary for testing on children who have been neglected or abused.
3. Chemical studies on any children outside of the U.S. are acceptable.

taken from: www.organicconsumers.org

Whoever thought of this is retarded or has been reading too many comic books. If you dump pesticide all over your offspring chances are they'll get really pissed at you later in life. Your soul will rot in hell and your child will not be the next spiderman.

Weekend Update

Instead of going to my regular hangouts here's what I did instead.



1. Looked stylish in some bowling shoes at the Landmark
2. Sipped cosmos with some fine gentlemen at Hotel Metro, hey Sara did you call that guy yet?
3. Bounced around in a sea of napkins, sang songs and broke glasses at Lucilles.
4. Figured out it's perfectly normal that an estimated bar hopping travel time in Appleton is between 10-30 minutes.
5. Regulars in Appleton like to buy a round of shots that they thought of themselves. Apple Pucker shouldn't be allowed in bars, only in a 5 mile radius around a University
6. Received wine not from a normal bottle but the little airplane ones, talk about quality
7. Hit the dance floor with the only other single girl in our 30+ group and was able to dance with anyone and everyone
8. Involuntary task of become the relationship therapist for my drunk friends who are in a love triangle
9. Had a good hearty conversation about porn
10. Proved strong and didn't eat the meat slices of our 3 foot by 3 foot pizza.

Day Seven

I"ve been waiting seven days to post this. It seems one week or one month or one year seem to mean something more than 5 days, 5 months, 5 hours, etc...
Well I'm happy to announce a major life decision. That is the choice not to eat meat. Sorry Grandma - no turkey for me for thanksgiving, cow tongue for christmas (gross) or fishes (for now) from up north. I finally got disgusted after waiting for deli meat. I wanted to puke right there but I didn't because I've been eating it for 23 years. Then a week ago I got a book about living lightly on the earth and that just pushed me to give up meat right there ( After I finished my tuna salad sandwich - a girl can have her last meat meal! ). So it's been one week. Today at the Michigan Diner with Jeff was my first experience dining with a meat covered menu. It should be an interesting challenge. I will miss certain food but in the end I feel my soul will be better for not eating something with a brain, what we receive from the land will be some much more fruitful and my body will be in slammin shape. ( As if it isn't already )

Can of Dreams

So I woke up this morning very confused. I had a dream that in the dream I could decide between two things and I picked the thing that was worse. Now why did I did that? Did I do it because I knew it was a dream and I could indulge without hurting anyone? Or did I do it because my subconscious is saying something to me?

Suspicious eyes

When you know someone is doing something they shouldn't, what do you do?

Gone Fishin'

I took the day off work and decided what better to do than go fishing with my friend Brian. We caught some bass, walleye and cropee. I hadn't seriously fished since the days of my snoopy fishing rod but I had heaps of fun. Don't worry we threw all the fish back (alive).

Hitchhiking

Finally saw Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and loved it. I had no idea what it was about. There's been this guy that's been trying to get me into for years and I thought it was some Star Trek geek thing. I was pleasantly surprised and now and can't decide who I have a bigger crush on Mos Def or Marvin.

In the game of Life

Growing up I was raised on Chinese checkers, connect four, candy land, monopoly and of course dominoes, nothing that would determine your profession, salary or family size. My little cousins got me to play the game of Life.

My first choice was to go to college or chose a career. Everyone else was going to college so I followed. I got to chose 1 or 3 professions (travel agent) and salary (90,000). Then I learned that salaries could be traded as well as careers.

Then I found out I had to get married and put a little blue guy in my passenger seat on my red station wagon. I have no idea who this guy is. Why is my salary supporting both of us riding around the life board. I should be able to pick a card for him and if says doctor I could trade seats and be along for the ride. No, not the case. I can't even kick his ass to the curb if he is a starving artist. What gives?

And now I have I have to have babies with this stranger. Just my luck, I have a boy and a girl. I don't even have time to pick their names but the major up side is no breast feeding. (like I have time to while driving).

Previously I had to pick a home. I'm camping out in a trailer. At least it's cheap because god knows my hubby isn't chipping in. Then I land on buy a cabin. I can't even trade in the crummy trailer or leave my family in the trailer and run. No I continue on. I am the first to finish and I'm already a grandparent by now and my kids still haven't left the car. They must have got the genes from my hubby to sit around and mooch of mom. Where's the education? When do they support me? Well I'm walking into the milliondollar estate and making a martini. I came in second place after my cousin that became the celebrity and her car was empty, no kids. I refused to play a second time. Thank god I never played that while being a kid because I would have some really large expectations to fulfill.

Once upon a time

Once upon a time I found a little creature up in the rafters of my grandparent's patio umbrella. First, I screamed like a little school girl. Then I thought, hmmm, he is rather cute.


I wasn't having good luck with men that week so I took him down and gave him a kiss in hopes of him turning into a prince.


He just stayed their on the stick and finally jumped away. So the moral of the story is never let little girls read or watch Disney inflicted media. It will be a harsh reality when they figure out men are evil bastards, they are fat, lazy and all they want to do is drink beer and have sex. Of course the dumbass isn't going to turn into a prince he has smoked too much pot and dealt with enough crazy girls to even want to give you a chance. I'm signing up to be a Asian bride. Shoot I can't even do that. Rats.

How long is too long?

How long is too long to leave food with mold on in the fridge? Not food, but molding food? I ask because my roommates leave leftovers in the fridge for over a week, and obviously longer since it now has mold specimens on it. Now it takes a bit of time for mold to show itself. I'm curious as to would my roomies eat the food that has been in there between the stages of 5 days to pre-mold. Do they not know that they had Chinese two weeks ago? Are they waiting for a late night craving to finish it off? Just throw the food away! Now there is an abundance of molding leftovers so obviously they don't know who's is who's because there is so much nasty shit in blue and purple tupperware containers. Seriously clean it out man, go to the grocery store, keep it real, keep it healthy. The only green substance allowed in this fridge, vegetables (brocollii, asparugus, green peppers, etc.) mint leaves, lime juice, and green apples. (Mint ice cream goes in the freezer) No green frosty cake, no green beer, no green milk even though one may want it for St. Patty's day. No, it's not natural man. Food colored food is whack and I won't be having any of that. My goal this week is to teach them about mold. Next week is show them the trash dumpster outside our building. Until then keep it clean folks.

Bringing back the list

I did what?

1. Wondered where my money went
2. Told the waitress I spilled my drink because I was doing the robot (note: I was sitting not standing)
3. Woke up wondering why my bed was moved to the other side of the room, thought I was very ambitious, then I realized I wasn't in my Milw. apartment.
4. Played dominoes at a bar (double twelves for those who are curious)
5. Was the bigger person and went to say hello to the girls who spread rumors about me in high school
6. Said helloooo to Kevin Garnett. at the bucks game. 12 rows up. he was making a basket
7. Had a conversation about body hair (see below)
8. Went to a brewery tour and didn't really do the tour part
9. Had to leave the bar because I am freaked out by someone who dresses up as a hot dog
10. Yelled at the tv, punched the couch, kicked the wall and became a mute around 3:15 Sunday. I hate the Vikings.

Carpet Samples

So I was sitting at the bar drinking my vodka lemonade when the guy sitting next to me randomly explains that he is a carpet from his neck down ....Isn't that yummy?.... Yeah, Can I take you home throw you on the floor and roll around on you? Yeah if you were a carpet, not a wolf man. He even did some show and tell, showing me his arms and explaining that this was the least amount of hair he had. Listen, if I can braid your arm hair chances are, first, I'm drunk and second, I'm going to bust to the nearest pool and screw the first swimmer I see. Yes please do not tell me about your hair problem, it's not a turn on. I don't want to feed you bananas and clean up your shit. Please, men, invest in some razors, wax treatement, tweezers, nose hair trimmers, and heaps of porn.

Danielle

Here is a pic of me and my sister when we went to the kite show, I'm on the left, she's on the right.

The very first memory I have of my sister is stepping on her chest. Why? Because she asked me to, swear on my new pair of shoes. Now, whether I might have plunked in her mind that stepping on her might be a good idea well that is certainly a possiblity. This also means she was old enough to talk, so.... hmm.... yeah I guess she really didn't exist till age 2 or whenever one starts talking. I also convinced her that she was adopted. Fairly recently we couldn't find her birth certificate and I did the "I told you so" there was silence on the other end. No my sister is finally cool. After years her spilling my milk, making me get grounded, ruining my parties, being spolied, etc... she finally grew up and so did I. So boys, be good to her. Love ya sis. Man I'm getting soft.

Feeling Five

Can't wait to go to work tommorrow. Last week I designed my second favorite print piece, ate playdough, measured the heights of my coworkers (pencil line with name and month)- blew bubbles and rode my bike with a yellow balloon. Its a wonder I'm still there. Eh I love it.

Surviving Luxury

How much money do you think you need to live on for exactly one year?

The Lazy Dater

Someone who we will call "Brian" said I was a lazy dater.

He referred to it meaning that I date people that by location are close to me, across the street, in a classroom, and upstairs. If we chose our mates that are relatively close in distance does that make us lazy or was it a coincidence? My feelings of a lazy dater immediately refer to a good friend back home who's philosophy for dating girls is "let them come to me while I sit here." So when my friend referred to me as a lazy dater I automatically thought that he meant that I put minimal effort into a relationship and was then offended. So thinking about it - is it too convenient when our location brings us closer to our mates? Does it add or take away any emotions and what kind of emotions?

the questioning room

In a battle of making decisions where do we make them - from the mind or the the heart?

In a quest to find out more below are my findings. But if say, for example, you had to choose between two different things - one made your heart rush and the other was more in depth, planned, now fail safe because it has been thought about from all sides. ha - I think I just answered my own question....

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"In ancient Egypt and Greece, the heart was the most important organ. Greek philosopher Aristotle (384-322B.C.) noted that an injury to the heart meant immediate death, whereas head injuries usually brought far less serious consequences and could even heal. He observed, too, that one's heartbeat changed with one's emotional state and that the brain seemed to be without sensation, for touching the brain of a living animal evoked no response. The action of the heart, he concluded, seemed to correspond with life itself. The soul-the independent force driving that life--most likely resided in the liver

Unlike Aristotle, Pythagoras (circa 570-496 B.C.) and Hippocrates (circa 460-370 B.C.) both had considered the brain to be the "noblest" part of the body. Plato (427-347B.C.) shared this point of view. He assigned the lower passions such as lust and greed to the liver and the higher ones such as pride, courage, anger and fear to the heart. For reason, it was the brain." -Robert-Benjamin

__________

"head thinking is fractured and separatist, while heart thinking is holistic...Head thinking is fractured. It will look at one aspect of a situation at a time and draw conclusions based on that, while ignoring others. Modern civilization is a perfect example of head thinking, for all its systems are based on separatism." -Suma Varughese

_________

"How many times have you heard people around you say “my heart is saying yes, but my mind is saying no?” That’s basically where this theory originated from. My friends and I are always talking about our problems, just to verbalize how we feel. We find it funny how we all know what the right thing to do is, but somehow, our heart manages to influence our minds and confuse us even more. It’s like my pastor said, The heart is a very deceitful thing.

At the same time, how can you feel that genuine love without it? No matter how much you try to rationalize with your heart, it often wins over the mind; thus, heartbreak occurs in most cases. The brain is usually right - don’t get hurt - it says, but the heart is so stubborn that it always has to find out the hard way. The real battle in life is between the heart and mind." -Masungit.net

Good Karma

If you think is something is too good to be true do you accept it or wait for it to fail?

Staying for the Sun

It was one of those revitalizing nights out where nothing was planned and the unexpected happenings made it brillant. So I stayed till the sun came up and then some.

What! Was I not just talking about Migrating?

It is strange, some of the most vivid memories I have is from Australia. I don't have a lot of pictures but I can remember everything so clearly. Maybe it was a combination of not being burdened with school, being on my own, developing my pallette for beauty. I don't know if there is a day that passes that I think about that beautiful place. Well there is lots of stuff I think about everyday like coffee, my mom, people that meant a lot to me and new ideas. So I am very afraid of being cold and whammo - check my email and my boss in Oz is trying to get me to go back and work for him. (It's turning summer now down under) Now the million dollar question - do I follow what I set forth in my previous post and say yes?

When did fall get here?

I know fall is here because I have a cold and cannot find a long sleeve shirt in my wardrobe of tank tops. I have one pair of closed toe shoes - the rest are sandals. Where were the tv commercials telling me that I had to go out and buy shoes, pants and sweaters. I've been living in warm areas from February till now and have adjusted to it never getting cold. I feel like I need to migrate south....or into a bottle of cough syrup...

Honesty

When does honesty run its course?
In my day to day quest of functioning as a normal human being I have found being even more up front about things makes others more interested. Like if I am embarrassed by something or someone, rather than keep it to myself I've been giving it up and people seem to be handling it with a more humorous attitude which makes me feel much better about the situation. But where is the limit? When is it too much information?

advice

advice at a thai restaurant
-from a friend's fortune cookie: the best happiness is the happiness you can give to others
-from a semi-conservative friend: the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.
-from me: make sure there is water before putting the hot pepper into your mouth

advice on brady
-from me: try thurmans at least once, don't shower before you go and bring your pipe.

advice at brothers
-from random man: kick the guy in the balls who is using the women's restroom
-from Brian: if we sit here long enough waving our money we're bound to get served
-from me: don't step foot into this under-aged-over-dressed crap hole who can't even serve their elders

advice at terrace
-from the ho's: wear gold shoes, short skirts, dance in a corner and let the bartender spray you, you're bound to have a hot date lined up (for the evening)

advice at rosies
-from me: chill out with a pitcher among friends

Driving for Doughnuts

Ever feel like you're stuck in a routine and you're never going to get out of it? I felt like that all last week and today it occured to me that routine is ok as long as you have little surprises along the way. Maybe today it was the spontanoues formation of a volleyball team, or lunch with a bubbly friend, or an unexpected present when I got back from lunch. It makes sitting in front of a computer go by a lot easier.

When I was listening to a Buddhist radio station they were talking about change. I know some people that fear change, motto being: change is evil and will repent against it. The speaker actually embraced change and became more animated because change is a good thing. It is something new and exciting. I even wonder if change can be a routine? The most simple example being, If you keep changing your hair every month, does that then become a routine rather than change?

So end point being is that I've always been a "yes" person but I'm going to try to push that to saying yes to the unknown, the expected and hopefully that will create lots of little surprises along the way.

Metro?

How do you tell if someone is very metrosexual or gay? (without asking them)

The party's over or so I say

Upon walking out my door this morning a cool breeze (65 F) hit me. I realized that the party might be over. Still two weeks left of summer but the mindset has already taken over. Leaves were on the ground - mostly because of the big windstorm but I felt a little sad. Now it's time to drink hot cider, cuddle up with Tolstoy (War and Peace) and start having movie dates with my girl friends. I'd like to say I can't wait but I can.

The weekend Wrap-up sponsored by the Bears and Vikings loss

So Detroit is on top of the division, who would have guessed. But besides the Packers losing some other things good and not so good happened as well.

1. Seeing "Cut" at the art museum. If you didn't go you missed out on some phenomenal video cuts.
2. Starting off the Packer season with my old college friends.
3. Having a guy write his number on a napkin - being old school still rocks (too bad he wasn't my type).
4. Getting away with asking a guys obscene questions and making them perform acts in order to accomplish bachellorette party tasks.
5. Seeing a 13 year old boy fly a kite to electronic music at the kite show.
6. Not cutting my hair but coloring it. No I didn't do it myself.

7. Recovering evidence of what happened the previous night, keys back on keyring(good) shoes back in closet (good) seeing the aftermath of redbull and vodka (bad) seeing a bumper sticker pasted outside and remembering it was once on my ass (bad).
6. Going dancing with a girl I've never met before.
7. Rejecting a guy with the same name as a television show.
8. Hanging out with the sister.
9. Starting a collaborative art project.
10. Finishing a really bad book, Bad Heir Day. It's an English soap opera of wannabes and the wealthy.

He's coming for me

He sang Ain't Got You (to me) when he was in Milwaukee and now he's back to find me. Bruce is hitting up Wisconsin, again, this time in Madison, October 15th. But, why is he back? He checked his website,
" 'We're coming back to some of our favorite cities to make sure the fans get a chance to see how this tour has evolved over the course of the last 50 shows. Bruce just keeps stretching the boundaries of his performance night after night, and the result has been some of the very best concerts of his entire career,' said long time manager Jon Landau."
So, will I buy tickets right away? Nah, I'll most likely ebay it and see what happens. Once a year is awesome but if anyone wants a date, hey I'm there.

So you wanna be a rockstar?

So my co-worker/volleyball sidekick is also in a rock band called Fuzee. They played at Summerfest and now they are coming to a pub near you and me. Check them out Friday night at Points East Pub on LYON ST. Kicking some tunes with them are Moth from Cinncinnati and Pedal from Milwaukee. If your not sipping beers down at your house, pound them down here with a side of slamming rock.

cheers!

the Weekend Wrap-up sponsored by Advil and Starbucks

The week and weekend filled with:

1. Playing a bad first 9 holes and good back 9 holes at Lake Park
2. Trying to call it a night after the bar but instead getting thrown over shoulders and into the after party for more beer and more pool
3. Buying a painting I've been lusting over for 6 years. Come see it!
4. Acquiring beer goggles at exactly the wrong time
5. Not burning the couch
6. Being invited to an underground space in west bend where the speakers are up to the ceiling, records are being spun and the men can't believe a hot girl digs this music.
7. Painting my kitchen key lime pie green
8. Getting told I was "the one" after just being introduced. (Is that a new pick up line?)
9. Finding a solution to resolve the hunger and water issue in new orleans: dump large amounts of rice and pasta into the water.
10. Dad flying out to Arizona with his girlfriend, then coming back as his finance - congrats!

New Fav Music: Aqualung

From the Pabst Theater site:
"Vital, dramatic piano-pop songs radiate from London artist Matt Hales. Vocals swell and drop with beauty and sadness as Matt duets with his brother Ben in this stunning performance. The British songwriter creates a world-weary mood with just his keyboard and that wonderfully evocative voice. Aqualung's music is hauntingly beautiful and his performances are absolutely breathtaking. An uncanny knack for soft yet powerful melodies paired with an unparalleled emotional depth, Aqualung is the total package."

So I went out and got his music and I fell in love. He is playing Thursday night at the Pabst if anyone is not going to Rolling Stones or White Strips or Jazz in the Park or anything else that goes on Thursday nights in Milwaukee, come with me to go see Aqualung!