Work Outing

Today we had our first work outing in two years. Two years ago, about 6-8 people went bowling at Landmark Lanes. Today we left it up to our newest student to pick a park to play disk golf. I arrived first, smack dab in the ghetto. According to my map there should be a park building adjacent to the parking lot I was in. This building was the restroom. Then I walked some more I saw hole #1 so I knew I was in the right place all I had to do was wait. A car pulls up - hurray. The window rolls down and some man is trying to talk to me but it sounds like a bad version of Robert Downey Jr. in Tropic Thunder, you know the ghetto slang but with some chew in your bottom lip. After the third time of this man apparently asking me something I figure out he is looking for a restroom. Ah ha! I've already located it - right this way. A woman struts out to the restroom. The man, whom I've already learned is from Mississippi get out of the car to talk to me while waiting for his Milwaukee cousin. In one hand is a strawberry wine cooler and the other hand is down by his twig and berries all while asking me where I'm from, where do I work, why am I here. The woman in the bathroom could have hurried it by the time Mr Srawberry Cooler finished is beverage but nope. He finished it, noticed something about my toes - In the middle of me trying to figure out what he was saying he reached down and gently slide his fingers across my toes.

Where are my coworkers?

Finally the woman comes out of the bathroom and I'm too in shock to exchange contact info with my new friend so I wave in shock as they leave.

Enter big white van. This van is moving pretty fast at me and I've seen enough movies to know that this is a kidnapping van and I must move away. So I walk around like I'm a park ranger checking to make tee #1 is where it should be.

Where are my coworkers?

Then something magical happens. Two buff shirtless men jump out of the van with golf discs! Then more jump out! They inform me that they are part of a band from Texas and invite me to come see there show on North Ave. Awesome. Then they ask me where tee #1 is. I put on my park ranger smile and point " It's right over there." Oh they are impressed. They think I know this course, which means they think I know how to disc golf. Then they ask me why I'm there by myself and I feel lonesome and a fool who doesn't know what a disk golf frisbee even looks like.

The shirtless wonders wander off and I'm left waiting again.

After multiple phone calls to coworkers I have numbers to I get no answer. Is this a joke? Should I go home? Should I go back to work?

Finally they arrive. I learn how to play disc golf and by the last hole I learned how to properly throw it.